Much Ado About Nothing: Act 5

Act 5, Scene 1

Antonio tries to advise Leonato to relax in relation to what is happening with Hero, but Leonato is not having any of it - in fact, he says something similar to what Benedick said earlier: “Men can counsel and speak comfort to that grief which they themselves not feel”. In all, he’s telling Antonio that he can’t give advice on something he isn’t going through. But Antonio does tell Leonato to not let himself take all the grief, and to place some of the blame on those who have wronged him. Leonato agrees, and says he knows in his soul that Hero has been falsely accused. The false accusers themselves, Don Pedro and Claudio, arrive, and though they are pleasant towards Leonato, Leonato is not happy with them. He tells Claudio that he has wronged Hero and that she is now dead because of it. Claudio and Don Pedro can’t believe it. The four begin to get very angry towards each other and threats fly. Don Pedro says he is sorry about Hero dying but she was not accused of anything she didn’t do. Leonato and Antonio, angry, leave. Benedick arrives and Claudio tells him that he and Don Pedro “had like to have had our two noses snapped off with two old men without teeth.” He then tells Benedick that they have been looking for him to cheer them up with his wit. It might be interesting here that Claudio says “I will bid thee draw, as we do the minstrels; draw, to pleasure us.” Kind of reminiscent of when Beatrice says that Benedick is just the prince’s jester - which isn’t really true, of course, the three of them are great friends, but Benedick does have the reputation for being lighthearted, so his severe responses in this scene are particularly jarring to them. Then Benedick gives a fantastic speech to Claudio, challenging him as Beatrice asked him to. It’s so fantastic I’m giving you all of it here: “You are a villain; I jest not: I will make it good how you dare, with what you dare, and when you dare. Do me right, or I will protest your cowardice. You have killed a sweet lady, and her death shall fall heavy on you. Let me hear from you.” Despite the seriousness of Benedick’s speech, Don Pedro and Claudio still think he’s kidding around, so they joke that his “challenge” is a feast. Then Don Pedro tells Benedick about a conversation he had with Beatrice which was obviously before the calamity involving Hero but I’m thinking after the trick because of the last lines but also this may just be part of the trick - he says he praised Benedick’s wit to her, and she twisted all the words around to make them insults. But then she “concluded with a sigh, thou wast the properest man in Italy” (!). Properest meaning the whole package - according to a dictionary definition - fine, good, excellent, and handsome. Very cute. Then Claudio says “for the which she wept heartily and said she cared not,” and Don Pedro says “Yea, that she did: but yet, for all that, an if she did not hate him deadly, she would love him dearly.” Sooooo cute. But (and what Don Pedro and Claudio don’t know) Benedick already knows that she’s crazy about him in real life and his mind is focused on his mission: he says goodbye to Claudio and is disgusted at their “gossip-like humour”, tells them that Don John has fled Messina, and tells Don Pedro that he is discontinuing his company. He then leaves, and Claudio and Don Pedro, shocked, realize that he is sincere, and that it has something to do with Beatrice. Dogberry and company enter with Conrade and Borachio. Don Pedro is shocked that two of the men in Don John’s company are in police custody and asks why. Here’s Dogberry’s fantastic response: “Marry, sir, they have committed false report; moreover, they have spoken untruths; secondarily, they are slanders; sixth and lastly, they have belied a lady; thirdly, they have verified unjust things; and, to conclude, they are lying knaves." And even though I’m mad at him, here’s Don Pedro’s great response: “First, I ask thee what they have done; thirdly, I ask thee what’s their offense; sixth and lastly, why are they committed; and, to conclude, what you lay to their charge.” Then he says Dogberry is “too cunning to be understood” and asks Borachio directly. Borachio tells Don Pedro that Don John made him pretend that Margaret was Hero in Hero’s window, and that it is his and Don John’s fault that Hero is dead, and now Don John has fled. Leonato, Antonio, and the sexton come back and Borachio admits to Leonato that he alone is the culprit, but Leonato knows that it is Borachio, Conrade, and Don John that are at fault. Claudio and Don Pedro are remorseful, though it’s perhaps noteworthy that Claudio says “sinn’d I not but in mistaking.” Leonato says nothing can bring Hero back to life, but they should make sure everyone in Messina knows that Hero was innocent. Further, he has a niece (not Beatrice, another niece) who is like a copy of Hero that he will have to marry instead. Claudio is happy to take this offer. Borachio also insists that Leonato know that Margaret was not to blame and that she didn’t know what was happening. Dogberry also wants Leonato to know that Borachio called him an ass, and that Deformed was mentioned and that Leonato should ask him about that. Leonato says that he’s going to talk to Margaret about how she came to be associated with Borachio. 

Act 5, Scene 2
Benedick runs into (not literally) Margaret and he tells her that he is writing a sonnet to Beatrice, and Margaret jokes that no man ever writes her sonnets. They joke around a bit, and Margaret says his wit isn’t hurtful, and Benedick says, solidifying his place as my literary crush forever, “A most manly wit, Margaret; it will not hurt a woman.” <3 Benedick, like no other man in this show, knows that real men don’t prove their manliness by hurting women. He asks Margaret to get Beatrice, and she leaves. Benedick attempts to sing his poem but realizes that it’s not very good and that he isn’t made for the traditional methods of courtship. Beatrice arrives and they simultaneously flirt and insult each other as only they can. Yet another perfect thing about Benedick is that when he’s flirting with Beatrice he compliments her intelligence: “Thou hast frightened the word out of his right sense, so forcible is thy wit.” Benedick, by the way, has told Beatrice that he has challenged Claudio, and now asks her how Hero is. Beatrice tells him that she isn’t great. He asks her how she is, and she tells him she’s not great either. Ursula arrives and tells the them that it has been proven that Hero is innocent and that Don John is behind it all. They all return to Leonato’s house.

Act 5, Scene 3
Claudio reads something he has written in honor of Hero, and says he will do so every year in her memory. Don Pedro tells Claudio that it’s time they return to Leonato’s.

Act 5, Scene 4
At Leonato’s house, Friar Francis talks with Leonato about Hero’s innocence, and Leonato seems to for whatever reason think that Claudio and Don Pedro are also innocent which I guess is technically true because they were tricked, but they were still jerks about it. Antonio says he is glad that everything worked out, and Leonato tells Hero to leave and get masked. Antonio’s task is to pretend that Hero (in disguise as Leonato’s niece) is his daughter. Benedick asks Friar Francis for a favor, and tells Leonato that Beatrice is romantically interested in him. Yep, Leonato says, she looks at him with an eye of love that Hero “lent her”. Benedick says he is also romantically interested in Beatrice. Yep, Leonato says, with an eye of love “from me, from Claudio and the prince.” Benedick doesn’t understand what Leonato is trying to tell him, but regardless asks Leonato for his goodwill for them to get married. Leonato is very happy with this match (obviously) and Friar Francis says he will marry them. Don Pedro and Claudio arrive and Leonato tells Antonio to get “his niece”. Antonio brings Hero and Claudio asks to see her face. Leonato says not until he promises to marry her. He does, and Hero unmasks. Claudio and Don Pedro are shocked, and Hero tells Claudio that she is a virgin, as sure as she is alive. Which is kind of an awkward thing to say. Friar Francis says alright, let’s get to the chapel. BUT THEN Benedick asks Beatrice to come forward and she does and he asks if she loves him in front of everyone and she’s like pssssh of course not and he tells her that apparently Don Pedro, Claudio, and Leonato are mistaken, then, since he overheard them say she was and then Beatrice asks Benedick if he loves her and he’s like pssssh of course not and she tells him that apparently Hero, Margaret, and Ursula are mistaken, then, since she overheard them say he was and they go back and forth and then Leonato is like girl, I know you love him and then Hero and Claudio are like look, we found secret love notes you guys wrote and this gives away everything AND THEN Benedick is like, well, FINE, I guess I HAVE to marry you but it’s only out of pity and then she’s like well, FINE, I guess we DO have to get married but I’m only doing it after everyone persuaded me to and because you were DYING without me and then he’s like “Peace! I will stop your mouth.” and KISSES HER AND I’M D.E.A.D. Then Don Pedro teases Benedick now that he’s going to be married which he said he never would be and Benedick says they can tease him all they want, but it doesn’t matter - he’s going to be a happily married man now. Then he tells Claudio that even though he (Benedick) won, he will have mercy on Claudio and not fight him since they will be in-laws now. Then everybody is about to dance to celebrate the happy ending BUT more happy ending is needed so a messenger tells Don Pedro that Don John has been caught and is on his way back to Messina. Benedick tells everyone that he will think up the punishments for him, but that they don’t need to think about it until tomorrow.